Collection of thoughts   von PrinzessinMedusa
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                              Kapitel 9: My Drug
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Hey there Everybody ^-^

Hier ist mal wieder ein bisschen was "Neues". Einige werden es vielleicht schon
kennen, aber einige eben auch noch nicht. ^-^

Es sind wieder zwei kürzere Teilchen, die aber eng zusammen hängen. 
Feel free to comment. ^-^


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Out of Reach

You’re out of reach form me, and will always be, even if you’re standing
right here next to me.
And still you put me under your spell, not aware of you’re power over me.
Eagerly I take in your every word.
Your every movement burns itself deep into my memory.
I try to catch your eye, want you to notice me.
I look at you and you blow me away.
My heart is racing, I want to be funny and intelligent and embarrass myself
horribly.
I’m so helpless under your gaze, become your puppet.
The memory of you is enough to wipe out everything I am.
And even though they are so obvious, I can’t admit them to myself.
Maybe out of pride or fear.
Out of rationality, I want to make myself believe.


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My Drug

I get to wondering these days. What is it that I want? Whose dream am I
chasing?
I'm as confused as can be, can't seem to find the right way in the dark of the
night, 'cause every single one leads me straight to you. 
I try to live a decent live, one that is expected of me, one with you barely
involved. So I could answer the question who you are simply with "Someone I
know." But sadly enough (although I'm not sad about this at all) that is not
possible.
When my perfect, decent live bores me to death, when disgust fills my mouth like
spit, and everything is just a different shade of grey, you are like a fresh
summer rain. You wash away the dust of ages, or so it seems. Your every word is
like a fresh drop of crystal water that brings new life, lush green, to the
ashes of my soul.
The thought of your soft gaze upon me is comforting, it lights up the dark hours
and soothes me. 
When I'm tired of battle, sick of struggle, and too weak to do another step, I
want to turn to you for shelter, but I still try not to.
You stir up the oceans of my heart, you're the storm raging in my head. Look
into my eyes. See waves crashing, and lightning flashing. I want so much more
than just your words. I want to be your passion, your every thought.
And if my life was a book, I'd rip out all the pages about you, tear them in
little pieces, and burn them, because I can't stand wanting you so much. It's
driving me insane.
I can't handle standing here in front of you, not allowed to touch you, when it
would be so easy to just reach out, and run my fingers over your cheeks, through
your hair. I wonder what it feels like.
Can you see me shaking? I have to hold myself back hard. 
And I'm so tired of trying to read the signs. Hanging in mid-air, guessing "how
far can I go?", never knowing what will be, eats me up inside.
I swear if I could, I would just turn away, rinse you from my mind, but I
can't.
You are my drug. You're in my blood, control my thoughts. You take away all
reasoning and logic. 
I'm addicted to you.


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So that's it for now. Bitte lasst mich wissen, wie es euch gefallen hat ^-^ 
Für verbesserungsvorschläge bin ich immer offen. ^-^

so long
Fishly

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