MST: Protége moi von Ziva (or: how an emo was dumped on a CEO) ================================================================================ Kapitel 1: The Setting or: bore me some more -------------------------------------------- Anzu: Hello, and welcome, my… happy little hamsters. As you might have figured out by now, this is our new MSTing Project. Seto: Oh, what the bloody hell!? WHAT do you people want from me? Anzu, Mana& Otogi: ^___^ Seto: I hate you. All of you. And I hate MSTings. AND I hate English. And I hate.. Anzu: Yeah, we get your point. How about stop complaining, and let's start already. Seto: >.> fine. Mana: Ok! Mana will do the introduction! Mana can do that! All alone! Seto: WHAT is that? Mana: Mana! Alright! We will today MSTing a beautiful FF by [[SwordPrincess], who will hopefully flame us into ze graaaund, and let her groupies make our life hell, and such. Even though we don't want to hurt her feelings, and will only criticize her sappy, crappy first fanfiction. Which is in english, reason why we are all spiiikiiing ze iiiinglishh! Oh, and she requested this, by the way. Cheer for the Sword! :D Protège Moi Anzu: I am pleasantly surprised, that we have a foreign language- title that is in fact- correct. Otogi: But since we can't have the poor readers who are already tortured by the english language bother with another language: It translates as »Protect me«, which in my opinion is a pretty shameful 08/15 title. You, who invented it, go stand in a corner. Anzu: You know, what scares me most about this? The striking resemblance of the title to the one of the MSTing Ziva did before this one O_o Just with an extra "moi"... ew. Chapter 1 Why me? What have I done to deserve so much suffering? I haven’t hurt anyone, and I always try not to be a burden to people around me. I know, I am one, but I can’t change that! I swear I’m trying. Why can’t anyone tell me what to do? Why can’t anyone tell me how to be useful? Seto: How dare she put this in italics? That is a very MSTing- unfriendly behavior. WE are the ones using italics here, and only us! I will consider taking legal action against this! Anzu: Ever since the series ended, and they told him, that he opened a crappy school that teaches retards how to play a card game, he's been kinda cranky… I can’t talk to anyone about this. Anzu: Why did I expect this? Otogi: Because all of them emos claim that. Have no friends, and so on… Anzu: Friends? Oh, I know about friends! Seto: Go figure. My mother died a few weeks ago and since then I’ve been living with my father and my brother. Seto: How sad. I think I'm gonna cry. Not. Joey’s not of age yet, so we can’t live together only. Otogi: I'm Japanese, so my English sucks, but isn't that a very German sentence? Anzu: Try replacing »only« by »alone«. But we should really shut up about this. The authoress might fry us. We have to stay with our father. Seto: And let me guess: He's violent and mean, and makes your lives hell. Usually he doesn’t even notice we are there, but whenever he does – when he has drunk far too much, as always – he’s turning our lives into a hell. Everyone: O.O' Mana: You're psychic. Seto: No, I just had the misfortune to stumble across my share of Puppyshipping. And they all start like that. … … Wait a minute. This… isn't possibly… Anzu: Don't worry, it's not. It's Silentshipping. Seto: Whatever that stands for. But the »silent« part sounds good. I wish I could just run away, but there’s my brother. He always tries to be strong and protect me, although he can’t. He could have run away a thousand times, but he never did because he wants to protect me… Mana: Alright. If he wanted to run away.. then why exactly did he not do it all the time, you were with your mom, and he had no one to bother with? Anzu: Good point. But if he had, someone would have been left without a plot, and we can't have that, right? Seto: I think, we can. It would have made my life a lot less miserable. Another proof that I’m only a burden. Why isn’t there anyone out there who can protect me? Why? Why? Why? Otogi: I can see an easy solution to all of this. Go, kill yourself. Now. Now. Now. Then we can ll go home, and your brother can finally leave. Yay. But I'm afraid, that won't happen… - Serenity closed her diary. Seto: Do you know, what I hate even more than MSTings and English, and… stuff? Dub- names -.- my day is ruined. I hate you all. Anzu: As I said, dear readers.. the whole academy- thing.. err, well… just don't mind him. Otogi: What? The emo- bitch is my Shizuka? Argh. She didn’t want Joey to read what she had written. It would only hurt him. Anzu: Yeah, apart from the act of reading another persons diary being awfully rude. No one decent would read it, even if it was sitting there, wide open and with little neon- bulbs attached to it. Seto: Her brother is Katsuya. You don't honestly expect decency, do you? She knew he wanted to protect her, but she also knew that he wasn’t able to do it. Seto: Oh, please. It's Katsuya, alright, and he's useless. But what he lacks in brains he has in muscles, he even managed to protect that bothersome Yugi Mutou. She couldn’t tell him. She couldn’t tell anyone. Anzu: Yeah, we got the idea. And we all feel oh-so sorry for her, and now cut it out, alright? She was sitting in her room and was shivering. She felt thirsty but she didn’t dare to go into the kitchen and get something. Mana: Try putting leaves on the ground, and wait until morning. Works for the survival- people. Seto: Yes. Outdoors. Her father had stopped shouting some time ago but she was still frightened. It was cold, too. Otogi: Who was he shouting to? The dead mother? I mean, no one said, Joey was there right now. Seto: Because no one bothers, and we shouldn't either. She took a pullover out of her wardrobe and put it on, and then she walked to the window. It was kind of useless to have it closed, regarding its status, so she opened it. Anzu: Its status being what? Being a window? Sure, it absolutely doesn't make sense to have a window closed, I fully agree, because.. err.. they are capable of opening?! Either that, or I'm just to retarded to understand this one. It was hardly colder outside, but the night air felt so refreshing. The full moon was shining and she could see so many stars. Anzu: Oooh, the moon and the staaars *_* It's soooo bjutifuuul. Gosh, man. Seto: I feel sap approaching. That, or more emo- outbursts. While she was thinking about her life she felt so miserable that she started to cry. Seto: … you know…. I kinda don't like people who have nothing better to do than dwell in self- pity for 33 lines. Why…” she whispered. Mana: »Because…« Mana whispered back. Anzu: Yeah, we could've done without this. Why was she continuing if she only caused so much trouble for others? It would be so easy just to jump… Yes, this would solve all her problems. Otogi: As I already proposed a long while ago! Now, can we finally call it a decision, and get it over with? Anzu: Oh, but that would make the fanfiction awfully short… Otogi: And that would disturb you because..? Anzu: I've been fired, and have nothing else to do? Otogi: Oh, I see. She looked up to the sky as if to say farewell to the world – when she suddenly saw a shooting star. Seto: … Which, oddly, was flying directly towards her, and bombed her away, the end. Or.. Le fin, to keep it french. “One wish…” A last flickering of hope caught her. “I wish to find someone who will protect me!” she said into the darkness. Anzu: Get a bodyguard then. Seto: *takes the »-ing« and slaps Serenity with it, multiple times* Flickering: Caught ya! Your turn! *runs away, giggling* Mana: .. What was that..? Anzu: Never mind. And for a moment she had the distinct feeling the wish would be fulfilled. She closed the window and went to her bed. Seto: Yeah, I'm afraid so. No one expected anything else, really. It's just the ordeal in between that bothers me deeply. Maybe there was hope for her after all? Anzu: There is hope for anyone. You just have to try.. *sap, sap, puke* Mana: *holds the bucket, smiling because she's finally able to do something* Or maybe she was only afraid of jumping? Mana: For some reason, I have to think about Tokio Hotel… Anzu: *decorates Seto's hair with white streaks, and musses it* Now. Seto: *sings bone- shakingly off* Ich schrei in die Nacht für Dich, lass mich nicht im Stich, Spring nicht…..!!! ... .. What a low- quality song o_O Who on earth would SING that? Anzu: Eh.. you just did. Whatever, she decided to wait some more time. If nothing happened she would still be able to end it… Anzu: This is not the kind of logic someone wanting to die has. Seto: Thus, making her just another suicide- bitch. That being a certain kind of idiots, who run around proclaiming their seemingly terrible state of depression , while joyfully wielding a cutter or similar object, waiting for someone to walk by, and express their pity. They are, by the way quite common on a certain hotspot named animexx.de ;P She shivered when she thought that. Seto: *takes the »when«, and throws it in Serenity's direction* Serenity! Ow! ;A; As: I feel unappreciated. She didn’t realize yet, but she kind of understood that she didn’t want to die yet. Seto: As we elaborated above. She shook her head and went to bed. Seto: I would shake mine, but I think, I'll save that for later. Anzu: You're gonna need it. - “Is this supposed to be a joke? Otherwise I suggest you clean your desk within the next two hours, except you want the corporation to keep the stuff.” Mana: I thought, he only got choleric when GX started? Anzu: Yeah. About that. To be honest, he always was. But still, just don't bother, everyone. ”I-I-I’m s-s-sorry, Kaiba-sama, I just thought that I-I-I…” Mana: Poor guy. But not exactly a wonder, that he's getting fired, considering, that he isn't able to speak properly anymore, after a mere outburst of rage from a teenager. He must suck at life. BIG time. ”You thought that you could just leave your desk to go to lunch one hour before the break and you expect me to pay for this as ‘job-caused expenses’?” Anzu: Yeah, because that would hurt you so much, you rich bastard. Let it go. ”I-i-it w-was a m-m-m-mistake, I’m s-s-sorry, it will never h-h-happen ag-again, Kaiba-sama, I…” Seto: Can someone get that guy some speech- rehabilitation, this is annoying. ”You’re right, this won’t happen again because you’re fired! As I told you, you’ve got two hours time to clean your desk. And now get out of my sight!” Otogi: If he always throws a fit like that, over peanuts like that, I guess he's not very popular. Anywhere. Anzu: Yes, well. They failed to teach him the concept of employees being the most effective when they're happy and stress- free. Seeing how other corporations are adapting to this, I guess, Kaiba Corp. won't make it much longer. The unfortunate ex-employee bowed and went away as quickly as possible and his colleagues turned to their work again. Everyone was suddenly very interested in their work. Anzu: I wouldn't bow. I'd tell him, what I thought of him, if I was fired anyway. Mana: Mana would kick him! Seto: And Seto would never employ any of you two. When Seto Kaiba, CEO of KC, was angry, it was a very, very bad idea to raise his attention. Otogi: Too many abbreviations in one sentence. Some people might suffer epileptic seizures from them. Anzu: No, no, no. That happened on »Pokémon« already. Named CEO, however, didn’t care about them at the moment. He whirled around and went to the lift to get back to his office. This silly trouble with that incompetent employee had taken far too much of his time. Anzu: Alright, at least he understands that it's silly. Which is a plus. It's the first step, to solving the problem, Seto. The problem being your attitude. Seto: Shut up. He had a look on tomorrow’s dates and nearly swore. School… One of the few things even he couldn’t avoid: Class tests. Otogi: Does anyone else find the idea of a schoolchild being CEO completely far-fetched and laughable? Anzu: Nearly as laughable as the concept of saving the world with playing cards. Unfortunately, this is the concept of our series. Face it. We're all idiots. Great, absolutely great! Tomorrow was likely to be a crap day. Otogi: Oooh, does little Kaiba not like school? Poor guy. Go, and fire some more staff for recreation. He sat down behind his desk and started to hammer onto his laptop. Anzu: If you're not careful, it will break. And since a meal seems to expand your budget, I'm sure, a laptop would make you bankrupt. Seto: It's not about the lunch, it's the audacity of taking such liberty… *growls* Anzu: … yeah, sure. Whatever you say. Some time later the door to his office opened. He looked up angrily and was just about shouting at whoever dared to enter the office of Seto Kaiba without announcement – Otogi: Someone likes his »-ing« a little too much… but he could just suppress this reflex when he saw that it was his little brother. Anzu: Oooh, it's Mokmok! *_* Seto: WHO?? “Er… nii-sama?” Mokuba asked. “What’s wrong, do you have much work?” Otogi: He's a CEO. Don't they like.. usually have a lot of work? A lot of, by the way, not much. Anzu: Since when are you an expert for foreign languages? Otogi: Since dice don't sell anymore. Anzu: Oh, so you've always been? Why didn't you tell us? “It’s manageable.” Mana: That's some working spirit! Mahaado (out of the otherworld): Yes, something YOU could have put to a lot of use, some 3000 years ago!! Mana: O_O Somehow… strange things and voices keep appearing here pretty often… Yeah, means you’ll be working ‘till tomorrow at seven a.m.! Mokuba thought. Anzu: And thus failing your exams, not getting an acceptable final score, to then be the most unqualified teenage CEO ever. “You know that you’re writing some class tests tomorrow?” he asked carefully. Seto: No, my dear brother, I know less about my life, than you do. Isn't that sad? >.> The snorting noise from behind the desk told Mokuba that his brother knew it perfectly well – and that he wasn’t very happy about it. Anzu: Who would have thought, that you don't like school either, like any normal child. So you have human bits and pieces after all… Seto: What did you think I was, up until now? Alien? Anzu: Egyptian o.O (On the other hand, when is Seto Kaiba ever happy?) Anzu: She makes a point. But still, does she HAVE to put her brackets in the middle of this text, that was annoying to begin with, but just got even more so? Mana: I hear, when she does it nowadays, it means, that her split personality reaveals herself… ”Your grade is taking part in this new project, isn’t it?” “What project?” Seto asked uninterestedly. Seto: I take back my sarcastic remark from before, and rewrite it as honest remark. My brother does INDEED know by life better than I do. I suck. “Oh no, nii-sama! Don’t tell me you don’t know about that! You’ll be one of those who must take part in it!” Otogi: That being because..? Anzu: I'm guessing that if he doesn't, there will be a problem with making the plot work. As in »finally«. “What are you talking about?” Seto asked. Mokuba sighed. Sometimes it was really scaring how little knowledge his brother had about what was called “every day’s life” – involving school. Anzu: Talk about »the company is my life«… Otogi: I find it highly unnatural and worrying, that your little brother knows more about your duties than you. Someone has no life. And someone doesn't know about his. “The senior students who have an average better than 2.0 must take care of a freshman who needs help. They must help them in school, with homework, or other stuff they’ve got trouble with. It’s called ‘mentor-project’, and… well, with an average of 1.0 you’re on top of the list!” he informed his elder brother. Anzu: I found a plot device. *picks it up and bags it* Mana: Don't be so strict. It's hard to make Silentshipping work without them. Plot device: ;A; Please, don't hurt me. I swear, I'll be nice! *sobs in panic* Anzu: It's kinda cute… *_* Seto looked at him irritated. “I hope you’re kidding, Mokuba. I’m busy enough running a company, I’ve got no time to play baby-sitter for some silly teenager.” Anzu: Yeah, because you're so not a teenager. Look at the pot calling the kettle black.. or was it the other way round? Oh, who cares?! Mokuba looked to the ground. “I’m sorry, nii-sama.” he said lowly. I’m a teenager as well., he thought. He never said he’s too busy to look after me, though… Otogi: Yes, why could that be? Anzu: Are you suggesting anything not nice? Otogi: O.o No?! Are you? “What’s wrong? I wasn’t talking about you, Mokuba. That’s something different.” Seto said. He was frowning. Otogi: Because you're my brother, and I love my brother, but I can't be bothered to look after someone else, because I'm the bad, bad, cold guy, who spends his youth in a company, firing people, because they eat. Oh, my… honestly. How can anyone stand this guy? Mokuba looked up again and smiled. “I know, nii-sama.” Mana: Li-aar! Liaar! You doubted a moment ago! Little Liaar! Seto: … children. Seto started to hammer onto his laptop again and sighed. Anzu: I dunno, but normal people just »type«. I don't get, why you need violence or force on something sensitive like this? Or is it maybe a very old laptop? Where the keys are already stuck? Seto: It's high end >.< “Great…” he murmured through his teeth. Tomorrow would be a crap day. Seto: Yeah, I'm convinced of that one. But now, it's break time. Legally. You may eat. Anzu: Seto… don't be sad, but when we like to eat, we will certainly do so, even without your approval. Seto: What? >.< AN: First chapter, on here for a while and now the format should be better, too. Otogi: Yeah, the formatting was impeccable. Seto: What are you saying? Did you forget the italics? I.. Otogi: Ignore that. It WAS nice. We liked the formatting. And also… … … … the words. Maybe not how they were assembled, but we liked them individually. Really. Hosted by Animexx e.V. (http://www.animexx.de)